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Being Known: Weekly One Hour Conversation with a Friend

By: Tom Grosh IV, DMin

October 10, 2019

"Friendships will make or break your life. " — Justin Whitmel Earley, author of The Common Rule: Creating Habits of Purpose for an Age of Distraction




Shifting from daily to weekly habits sends me to the trellis/calendar to chart out next steps. No doubt a one hour conversation with a friend provides an opportunity for accountability, including the practice of Scripture Before Smartphone. But how much time, emotional energy, and depth of character do I have for real friendship? What is the ROI? Justin Whitmel Earley does not refrain from wrestling with the issues at hand.






  • How do you define friendship?
  • Give an example of how a friendship has blessed your life.
  • Give an example of how you have blessed the life of another through friendship.
  • Who in your life asks (and you feel the responsibility to sincerely answer), “Is there anything you aren’t telling me?”
  • What is dark, i.e., requiring “light,” in your life?
  • Have you ever confessed that you were not telling the truth to your closest friend(s) or had a friend confess to you? How did the conversation and next steps play out?




I cannot shake from my mind Justin Whitmel Earley assertion, “The slant of modern life is to become busy people who used to have friends.” My observation is that this is all too true in professional education, professional life, the broad American way of the life, and cultural Christianity. Do find yourself too busy (or becoming too busy) for true, vulnerable friendships during this stage of life? If so, how can you adjust your commitments of time, energy, and resources?


Yes, one has seasons of focus which require more attention to study, work, and/or family, but beware of how habits, relationships and lifestyles are reshaped when what one anticipated to be a short season extends over weeks, months, years, and even decades. Perseverance relies upon cultivating a “life where you know and are known by those closest to you.” “The darkness rages in us, but honest conversation is a practice of light.” Let us not only courageously embrace the weekly habit of One Hour Conversation with a Friend, but also invite others to do likewise.

To God be the glory!



Forgive us for when we have sought worldly ways and success at the cost of friendship(s). Help us to see by your light that we are not alone in the darkness of our struggles. Fill us with joy and thankfulness that you are present with us each step of the way, even the most challenging ones. Grant us the courage to live vulnerable lives before you and with those you have called to press through daily life with us.


About Tom Grosh IV, DMin

Through a decade of interactions with current and future healthcare professionals as a CMDA affiliate staff at the Penn State College of Medicine's Christian Medical Society (CMS) / CMDA, the Lord ignited in Tom Grosh IV a passion to devote his next season of ministry to transforming lives with the Gospel through healthcare. Tom brings to CMDA in South Central PA over 20 years of experience with InterVarsity Christian Fellowship / USA. Most recently he served as the Associate Director of the Emerging Scholars Network (2012-2018). His responsibilities included conferencing, digital ministries, fund development, networking, and resource development. Tom has completed a B.S. in Biology (Grove City College), a M.A. in Higher Education (Geneva College), a M.A.R. in Spiritual Formation (Evangelical Seminary), and a Certificate in Spiritual Direction (Evangelical Seminary), and a Doctor of Ministry in Ministry to Emerging Generations (Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary). He is licensed in the Brethren in Christ Church, U.S. Tom and his wife Theresa grew up in Lancaster County, PA. They met while attending Donegal High School. Currently, Tom and Theresa are active members of Elizabethtown Brethren in Christ, where they serve in a number of ministry capacities. The Lord has blessed them with four children: Hayley, Ellen, Eden, and Lily.

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