“‘Will the one who contends with the Almighty correct him?…’ Then Job answered the Lord: “I am unworthy—how can I reply to you? I put my hand over my mouth’” (Job 40:2-4, NIV).

We were sitting outside on the porch with a rushing stream before us in the mountains of western New York. One retired doctor pulled me aside to share his story. When his only son was an infant, he developed meningitis. The course was terrible and prolonged. My doctor friend remembers his boy with both arms restrained and stretched out with IVs to where he could not even suck his thumb. His son recovered but has had a difficult life with deafness from the meningitis and other neurological issues. My friend lived with the guilt that he had failed as both a father and a doctor to save his child. He also lived with the realization that his God had also failed to come through. He relates how a few years later he was attending a Christian conference with his wife. The Christian speakers noted their pent up emotions and asked if they could pray individually with each of them. During that time of prayer, my friend had a clear vision of Jesus looking over his shoulder as he was reliving the memory of his young son, arms stretched out with tape and IVs, almost like he was impaled on a cross. He then very clearly heard Jesus say, “Don’t you think that I know what it means to watch a son suffer?”

It is certainly natural to blame ourselves when those we love and those for whom we are responsible suffer.

And it is natural to wonder why the all-powerful God we serve did not come through to help us when we needed Him most.

This man of God went through a true Job experience. And, like Job, the pain festered within him until God presented Himself over his shoulder. God did not touch the “why” of Bill’s suffering, but He came close and showed Bill who He is—the God who loves, the God who chooses to be present, the God who voluntarily allowed His own son to suffer to save us all. “…a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief…” (Isaiah 53:3, ESV).

We may think we will have a ton of questions to ask God when we reach heaven, but I suspect they will all dissolve as He leans over us and tells us of His love.

Dear Father,

I am comforted by your presence and the knowledge you have known my sorrows.

Amen