Love Never Fails

by Carol Mason Shrader

As a little girl, I remember Valentine’s Day so vividly—decorating a shoebox to hold our cards at school, picking just the right Valentine for each friend in our class and, uh, having bronchitis several years in a row and missing the whole thing.

I remember one year where my sweet Mama had gotten me the cutest little heart-decorated blouse and matching skirt to wear, and I could not wait! I was beside myself with plans of distributing my hand-selected Valentine cards to each member of my fourth-grade class in this cutest of ensembles! (Smile.) Only I ended up wearing it to the pediatrician’s office instead.

I was clearly traumatized, right?

By the time Wade and I started dating, I had fairly recovered from my trauma only to have our first three February 14ths together be…apart. One or both of us were traveling, working, not celebrating.

Then, we FINALLY had a year where the stars aligned, we were in the same place, at the same time, and completely free to celebrate the holiday. But so foreign to us was this concept that we failed to make a reservation and spent the night trying to get in one restaurant after another. Sigh.

And I know I do not have to tell even one of you lovely ladies what Valentine’s Day in medical school looks like? And residency? Oy. Emergency surgeries don’t stop so we can keep our long-scheduled reservation. Right?

So honestly, it would make perfect sense if this was not a holiday I celebrated with those less than perfect memories. And yes, I understand that to many it is an overly commercialized day intent on increasing floral and card sales. I once had a boss who refused to celebrate what he referred to as the forced romanticism. Blah blah blah. I get it.

But here’s my thing. It’s a sweet day. There. I said it.

In a world where we spend a lot of time—a LOT of time—fighting over every single thing, attacking each other and drawing lines in the sand over everything from football to cola preference and a lot of much, much more serious topics, isn’t it OK to take a day and focus on LOVE?

Really, how long has it been since you decorated a shoebox so people could drop you a note to say they think you are sweeter than candy?

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, NIV).

Maybe the day is a reset. Maybe you need to walk away from social media or even just take a minute to stop scrolling. Maybe you need to lay down a grudge you have been carrying around about your husband, your parent, your friend. Maybe you need to just take a deep breath and focus on how much you actually LOVE the people around you. Maybe you need to think about how much they love you.

Oh dear ones, there are seasons that are just plain hard to find the energy, the drive, the ability to love. But my goodness those are the most important seasons than ever to make the effort.

So, I am encouraging you—pull out your shoeboxes, construction paper and glue! Tell your people you expect a full box of affirmations and then reciprocate! Make some heart-shaped pancakes for your kids, buy a treat for a co-worker.

And for goodness’ sake, CELEBRATE THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE (even if it is on the 13th, the 15th or two weeks later when he has a free night off!!)! Remember, you can always scroll through the Love Challenge on Side By Side’s social media for ideas for how to make your feelings clear!

Happy Valentine’s Day, my dear friends. I am thankful for each of you and love you to pieces!

Blessings,
Carol M. Shrader

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Carol Mason Shrader lives in Wilmington, Delaware with her pediatric orthopedic surgeon, who recently told her he already has reservations for February 14! She may or may not have bought heart bow ties for her two dogs, and she can’t wait to wear the cutest little heart sweater!! She is ever intent in celebrating that love never fails.